The Keurig

My brother is not a human being.  He thinks that taking a 60 mile bike ride is the ideal way for someone to spend a little free time.  He believes that children need attention, love, and exercise and acts on those beliefs.  From what I gather he sleeps only three hours a day, and only then because not doing so would destroy his clothing at an accelerated rate.  I bring this up because I think that he has long since replaced his blood with coffee as he drinks the stuff in an amount that can only be measured in oil drums.

These are the main reasons that I have for why my brother disapproves of the Keurig devices.  For him it seems like a waste of everyone’s time when you brew any amount of coffee less than all of it.  I am pretty sure that there is a small community in Colombia that has a picture of Matt of there with the caption, “He pays everyone’s salary.”  I hope in this picture he is wearing a top hat.  That just seems right.

For everyone else, though, a cup of coffee once a day—twice if you are feeling special—seems like the correct amount.  For Veronica and me it seems like the perfect answer.  For the longest time I would brew a pot of coffee in the morning for the wife.  She would take a travel mug’s worth of it to work and I would normally take none. At the end of the day we would have something like ¾ of a pot of coffee just sitting in the kitchen, cold, and needing to be thrown out.  Thanks Mr. Coffee for the extra chore.

The best part of the entire device is that it does make a pretty good cup of coffee in just under a minute.  In all honesty it could probably brew a cup of mud most of the time and I would never notice, don’t tell anyone but I am rarely awake when I drink any amount of coffee.  Whoever thought of basically making a device that could spit out pretty close to instant hot water simply to allow people to wake up in the morning should receive some kind of prize for making the world a better place, fixing it so the thing use a cup to make the coffee and not really requiring anything close to fine motor skills probably just means that they are better humans, and entirely smarter, than I am.

You may also like...

4 Responses

  1. andy says:

    learned something from nana?

  2. Gillman says:

    The jealousy felt by Veronica over nana’s kuerig is what put the idea in my head to buy one

  3. Bio Mom says:

    I to understand the oil drum. But for someone who drinks a cup or two a day it truly is the way to go. Mom

  4. Marylou says:

    The thought of Matthew as poster boy for Columbian coffee works for me in a BIG way! Although mary Ann would also be a perfect candidate as well. Love the top hat idea.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *