When I was younger and lived in probably one of the least upscale sections of Clifton Park, on the very hottest days of summer, my mom used to kidnap children in the neighborhood and myself and drag us to the mall.Â At the time I assumed it was an attempt to curb our passion for playing in the street, but in all looking back it was the early 90s when an AC unit cost as much as a new used car (and as much in electricity as driving a car.Â Plus it killed the o-zone twice as fast) and the only place that could afford those units where the mall. At some point we started seeing movies, for a couple of reasons: the first, I assume is that it was the coldest place for 20 miles.Â The second is that I am pretty sure that we where spending more money in arcades, quicker, than it cost to take us to see a movie.Â Also at the movie she was able to garner at least a small amount of enjoyment (even though half the time she never really seemed to care what was playing as long as it would shut us up for a bit).
As an adult I know this cause my love for really bad movies and air conditioning.
So now, randomly, my mom will call me on the phone and ask if I am in the mood to go see a movie in the theater.Â After 20 years of conditioning it is hard to say no, even though most places have raised prices to the point that it is easier every day. Normally this will lead to a conversation about how neither one of us knows what is playing, but screw it– seeing a movie in the theater is fun.
That leads us to why I saw Prince of Persia the other day.
I will happily sum up the movie in three words: Generic. Action. Movie.Â Keep in mind that the choices at this point, after it has already been decided that we are seeing a movie regardless of the quality, range from Shrek in 3D (please add another 8 dollars to your 10 dollar admission.Â Also, ew, Shrek) to Sex in the City 2 (which is why one should always smuggle a knife into places to stab themselves with, so you have an excuse to leave).Â Suddenly the words “forgettable” and “what exactly happened” start to sound like a good choice.
I am sure that this will be brought up in the comments if I don’t address it now; at several points in the movie snakes jump out at people.Â Every time this happened my mom would shriek in terror, which would cause me to laugh like a mad man.Â She does have a way to make even the most boring movies enjoyable.
Also, Happy Birthday to my nephew Justin!